Obsessed with surf at an early age Brendan traded landlocked Ararat for the steely blue of The Great Ocean Road. Having spent years as a journalist, followed by a stint at Rip Curl where he produced their ‘Search TV’ Brendan has collated his published stories, and memories, to create ‘Deep Water’. It’s fabulous. Informative. Exciting.

In true surfer style it relaxingly introduces you to surfing, leads you through it’s history and takes you out the back with Brendan. The words are cut like Brendan. Barefoot, weathered, determined and intelligent. The perfect gift to inspire your man to follow his dreams. Check out Brendan’s blog. And buy the book here .

Apart from an actual bow tie, the best present you can give your man is the ability to tie one. This is were YouTube comes in handy. Thanks to Lucky, our ‘Cinch-it-down-sir’ (watch and you’ll see what I mean), your man will be dressed with flair looking slightly asymmetrical and sharp. Hot.

If you prefer diagrams, try this one. Maybe you can print it out and put it in the box with your pressie.

Head to Harrolds, or the Mens Department in either David Jones or Myer and track down a cheeky bow tie for your man. Classic black, or maybe something with a little more kick. Bring back the elegance.

They always pick dark school-uniform-slash-numberplate-blue colours that are most unattractive. They think they hide dirt. Well yes, in theory.

They hide dark coloured smudges. Like a girls mascara on a pillow case. However when a girl comes over that’s not the only thing you want to be disguising. And we all know that deep blue, grey, black and dark tones don’t cut it.

So. It’s up to you. With the ridiculous sales that DJ’s and Myer are always having one can procure a sheet set at a very minimal cost. Good quality too. These are my picks. And if you’re feeling like a bit of fun and your man has a double bed. Go for the Junior range. Who knew that they sell kids bedding in double size?? Brats.

For more details and a better idea of the range check out the Sheridan website. Live on the edge of the bed. Boot boring.

I’ve noticed a few sniffles around town. It must be the change in the weather. Everyone is coming down with something. If your man, or someone with a Y chromosome that you know is feeling particularly sorry for themselves then I have the perfect help-you-get-better-slash-sympathy gift. NO. It’s not another lemon tree. It’s a handkerchief.

Yes that’s right. You know those colourful pieces of material that you often see popping out of well-dressed mens pocket?! Yes, those. They have a use. So invest.

Visit Hanky Shmanky for a cute design like the one above. Or if you like Jen, head to Myer. But if you prefer Megan pop into DJ’s. You could even try Henry Bucks. Swisho.

Just remember. Handkerchiefs are environmentally friendly. And don’t leave white pillage all over your clothes if sent through the wash. Bonus.

Someone once said to me that men with really bad legs play golf really well. So. I’ve decided that golf is the best way to tell if the new dude your seeing has good legs, without actually taking his pants off. Classy.

Ball + Stick + Hole. It’s the answer. It doesn’t have to be 18. Only nine. Or even just a bucket of balls. Gold gift. Great date. You’ll be able to judge his creativity when it comes to swearing. That, and cut straight to the bone of his personality. Patience is a virtue. Special when you take 2 hours to get ready.

Try Albert Park, Elstenwick or Bulleen for a bucket of balls. Burnley for some putting practice. Or one of the Top 50 Australian Golf Courses for a round.

Very therapeutic. As long as you connect. Crack. Whack.

Oh. Hello.

My naame iz Peirrrrrrrre.

There’s something oh-so-sexy about a man with a foreign accent. A master of many languages. Ehh. I’m not fussy. Two will do . . . English aaaaand French/Italian/Spanish . . . I prefer something European-ish. However, Japanese is always a plus.

Treat you’re man to a few language lessons. He prob won’t come out with an accent. But at least he’ll be able to say I love you in another tongue. And count to 10. And maybe conjugate some verbs. Or maybe he’ll become fluent. Fluent in the languaaage of looooove.

This could be very beneficial. For you. And for him. A gift that keeps on giving.

The Lyceum Language Centre teach German, Spanish, French, Italian, Chinese & Japanese. Go for 10 week term of 1.5 hr lessons at $275. Also check out the Alliance Francais, The Victorian School of Languages or Opening Doors for Group Classes.

I’ve never seen such huge boobs in all my life. I learnt that every second ‘nude models’ name is Candy and that in Germany circa 1794 mothers that were breast feeding were required to make their breasts available to feed the needy. Wack.

Apart from anything it’s a fascinating documentation of photography and the female figure through the 50′s, 60′s, 70′s and 80′s. Translated into german and french this Taschen masterpiece is a must have.

Click here to read more. And here to purchase. And if this stretches the budget a bit too far, try the calendar.

Fun bags. Bless.

However this is inappropriate, and what’s more . . . illegal. Actually you could wrap up a bullet and send it over. That could be cool and very symbolic. Narh.

I prefer something more subtle. No silly, not a golf club. An old school traditional razor. Apart from the fact that you could slit their throats with one of these there’s something really sexy about a man using one. Kind of like Marlon Brando-esque. Very James Bond. Sigh. Oh Sean.

This little beauty is the Feather “Artist Club” razor.
You can pick one up at MensBiz. Alternatively If this is not your mans style you can get him a normal shaver with these blades *(double edged with platinum coating) that are known to be the sharpest of the sharp.

SO. You’ll either have a beautiful cheek to kiss or the perfect knife to slice. Cut throat. Enjoy.